going crazy

I just need to get out these feelings. For the last two weeks my husband has left for work at 4am and doesn't get home until after 8pm. I am with the kids all day with no break. This past weekend he had to work from home so I had to deal with the kids. I am so sick of dealing with kids I could scream. They don't listen to me, get attitudes and are disrespectful. I have hit my limit I want to scream I don't care if so and so hit you or I don't care if you don't want to eat this for dinner. I DON'T CARE!

I don't know if my husband's work schedule is going to keep up like this so for his safety I mean my sanity, I hope it doesn't.

starting new

well it has been a long time since I have been on here and thought I might dust if off and use it to get out some feelings away from Facebook and Twitter.

First I decided not to go to my 20th high school reunion in Sept. I don't feel like spending all that money to go see people who really could have cared less about me in high school. I have connected to these people through Facebook and have seen what I wanted to see. I feel like I have grown up and moved on. I don't feel sad about it. It is a good thing. Besides there is Facebook drama going on between a few people and I just don't want to be a part of it. Grow up.

Second I need to vent and not have to be judged about how I feel. I have been struggling with who I am lately. It will be almost 10 years since I held a paying job. I have been home all this time and it is becoming stifling. I have a few more years until all the kids are in school all day.

I just don't know who I am anymore. Well got to go. I have to take the kids to one of their classes.

First 5K

I ran my first 5K race today. I ran it in 28min 14sec. I was 2nd in my age group out of 12 and 31 overall. Not sure how many were in the race it was kind of small. All I know is that I beat a really tall basketball player and two other guys that were younger than me.

It was actually fun. I really liked the competition. I kept a consistent pace and I would pick people in front of me as I went and say ok I am going to beat that person and so on.

My boys kept asking me if I won the race and did I get a medal. They were a little disappointed I did not "win". I told them that it wasn't mommy's goal to win but to complete the race and that I had a certain time I wanted to finish. I beat my goal.

The boys got to run the 50 yard dash and they got a little medal for it. It was cute.

It was really fun and I am all ready signing up for another one in October.

5 years

Just realized my blog is 5 years old. I am so grateful for this blog. It really helped my when I felt isolated and alone with small children. I did not have a friend network where I lived and this community really welcomed me. I know that I haven't posted much this year because with the introduction of Facebook in my life I did not feel like writing a lot on the blog. Still this blog is my baby and maybe I will try to write more on here because there are some things I just can't share on Facebook and a lot of people on FB don't know about this blog.

So thank you to all who have read me for the last 5 years. Your friendship and support really mean a lot to me. I consider you all my friends.

kids they keep growing